Increase the value of your words

Many things are considered valuable because they are rare, and this can apply to your speech too.

By choosing to speak less often and remaining silent, you can dramatically increase your power and influence, which will have a direct benefit to your performance in every arena of your life. A big advantage of consciously staying silent is that it limits you from saying things you don’t mean whenever the situation becomes highly charged and emotional. Everyone has done this before, you probably know someone who makes a habit out of letting their emotions get the better of them and shooting their mouth off, do you want to be more like them?

Once the words are out there, you can’t unsay them, and if you just said them because you were hurt or angry, then you have compromised your integrity and you will feel shame for it. If you do this in a professional setting, it could affect your career and if you do it in a personal context it could destabilise your relationship which can negatively affect you in other ways.

Saying less than necessary will have two other beneficial effects for you: it will result in other people talking more to fill the silence and it will substantially increase the impact of your words whenever you do speak. The first effect is good because you will learn more and more about others – be they co-workers, sparring partners at the gym or your next opponent. The second effect gives you more power and influence because when you do speak, everyone listens.

In this way, you become more in control of the various parts of your life, you have more time and space in conversations, negotiations and relationships and more opportunities to stay true to yourself and advance toward your goals without distraction.

A final benefit of speaking less is that it allows you to control the tone of your interactions. Think of a typical boxing or MMA press conference – often it is all about “hype” with fighters trading insults and eventually, throwing furniture. The problem with this is that ever more outrageous antics are required to keep sensationalising the build-up, because fans have seen it all before. The same is true in your life – if you never stop talking, you will have to talk more and louder and say more outlandish things to be heard. Eventually, you will compromise yourself just to be heard. Don’t do it. Practice saying less than necessary and soon you will find that you can deal with even the most stressful confrontations with a serenity that makes others admire and respect you.